Things I Should Have Known Before Joining Campus

Things I Should Have Known Before Joining Campus

Congratulations you just made it to gycampus….I know you excited. Campus is this small heaven on earth.

I too was excited to get away from home. I was feeling like an adult. A good thing about campus is that you are your own boss. No one will boss you around. You do what you want to do.

Let’s get down to business.

RULE NO.1 -Know yourself

Boys & girls just be you. If you are a nerd keeping nerding around, if you the cool kid who doesn’t give a shit good for you, if you are a party animal then get ready to have some awesome fun, if you social then in a short time you will know the who’s who in campus.

Don’t try so hard to fit in….You will fit in automatically with some guys and some people you won’t be able to stomach being around them .Heck, look at me am a 20 year old guy who doesn’t drink or smoke and my life is just fine. You don’t have to change to be liked.

It’s a matter of DO and DON’T. Those are the 2 options you will have.

SQUADS

Just like high school in campus there are cliques/squads. By now most of you are in fresher’s WhatsApp groups. From mingling in those groups you will make friends and when you meet in sch you will all be one big happy family. Most of the time you shall be together. In a short while guys will couple up. The still single will try to get their mates.

This squads will determine how your 1st sem will be. On weekends you will all go out to party. There will be no use of the word ‘I’. The only thing you will be hearing is ‘WE‘ are going to this place/for lunch/ ‘etc

GUYS

When we think about campus what comes into our minds is boobs and asses. Trust me, there is something for everyone. We get into campus having one goal in mind ‘GETTING PUSSY’ For all fresher dudes don’t expect pussy to bring itself.

You are in a battlefield with 2nd years who want new meat(out with the old in with the new)Get your lazy ass up and hustle. If you want a girlfriend in campus you gotta work for it. Girls aren’t served on a silver platter. You have to prove you different from all the other Tom, Dick and Harry.

We are all told we are here to study and that we should chase that degree not women. I’m cool with that. If you want to study the library is open for you…For the rest of the dudes who are just passing by in university they won’t even look at the Library twice. Mr.Google is all we need as our library.

If you don’t have plans for buying a chiq lunch or dinner don’t meet with her during lunch/dinner hours. Meet with her at the most convenient time for you.

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By DEFAULT your roommate(s) are your friends. Like it or not they are. You will have to be friends as you tackle the 1st confusing sem together. Who do you think will wake you up, lend you money, remind you to take your clothes from the hanging line…

All it will take is for you to learn their habits and fit it into your life. If he loves playing Hiphop by default you will love it, if he brings women to the room and exiles you, by default you will get a girl and do the same fucking thing. Payback is a bitch.

CLASSROOM LIFE

This applies to both dudes and chiqs. There are two people in your class you need to befriend.

  • The class rep – if you close with him or her you will always know what’s going on that will somehow affect you. If the class rep is male then you women are in luck. You will be the 1st to be informed about anything because he too wants to bag a gf from the lot of you.
  • The nerd/geek/ the guy who never misses class. This guy/gal should be your friend. He or she will tell you when the timetable is out, they will give you their notebooks incase you missed class, Will inform you about CATS & Assignments, Tutor you when you become dumber than usual. In short its like they are your own personal assistant.

EXAMS

The worst thing in university other than the university is EXAMS. Exams scare the poop out of everyone.. Everything is smooth sailing but when guys hear about exams they freak out. That’s the only scaring thing in campus. During this time you will get guys taking pics of notes they don’t have.

Here is a hack to somehow pass your exams.

From the get go nail each CAT. If it’s out of 30 get above 18. You only need an average of 40% to pass your exam. I don’t care how you pass your CATS just pass them. Assignments don’t scare people. 9/10 guys will copy the assignment.

MONEY

Money comes and goes how you spend it will matter. If you spend all your cash on booze, weed, chiqs such that you lack cash to feed yourself then you are a fool. Chiqs are smart with their cash. Don’t get buried in debts.

Freshers your folks will ask you if you want them to send you cash weekly or monthly. Choose weekly. That way you will have a control on your spending rate. Don’t spend to impress.

LADIES

Almost everything around campus is pussy oriented. Bashes Will always be there as long as chiqs are available. No woman no party. Dudes will spending money to impress chiqs.

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What you chiqs have between your leagues is precious. Everyone wants a piece of that cake. It’s your super power. You got the keys to the streets. Because of what you have you may end up spending almost zero of your cash. Dudes would be ready to treat you as long as they want you.

If you happen to attend a party at least go with a friend who will take care of you when you get drunk. Someone who won’t leave you there if you don’t want to stay.

Girls it’s in your DNA to rarely get along with other chiqs. Most of your friends will be guys who failed to get into your pants or are still trying.

If you have a bf that won’t keep niggas away from you. There is nothing sweeter than a stolen pussy.

But be careful before you get termed a HOE. A dude who called you a hoe most probably never fucked or messed with you. You will hear that term a lot. Even you and your girlfriends may gossip about a woman you all think is a hoe.

In campus the walls have ears and eyes. Be careful what you say and do. You might not be aware of who is on the other side of the wall listening or watching.

RELATIONSHIPS

Beware of fake friends. If you going to have them at least they should be worth your time and effort. Btw your crush will be your biggest weakness.

Who is a sponsor? A sponsor is any guy way older than us and has more cash than us. If you in 1st yr and dating a 5th year, us dudes don’t see him as your bf. We see him as your small benefactor.

Some freshers join campus totally naive. Some will brag about how they have a boyfriend in a different university and how they love him. They will try to be loyal but 6/10 will eventually say yes to advances from the new guy.

Some join being virgins…If you believe sex before marriage is a sin that’s cool I respect that. Don’t contradict your beliefs. Maintain your v-card for a dude who might be somewhere sexercising.

For those who want to lose their virginity in campus peer pressure will make you fuck sooner than you anticipated. Don’t expect novel like 1st time sex. For 1st years your bf will probably break/fuck you in his hostel. By second year you will be saying you can’t get fucked in a hostel.

For those who have already been sexually active you will definitely fuck again in university. If you believe in no glove no love then keep protecting yourself. There are free condoms in school. Those condoms suck, just buy some from the chemist. If you hate condoms there is pulling out. everything about pulling out click here. If you believe:

USING A CONDOM IS DOUBTING THE POWER OF GOD. LET GOD PROTECT YOU.(CAN I HEAR AN AMEN)

NB. For those chiqs who love sex so much please get a dude that you will be fucking regularly. I don’t want to hear stories of you fucking this and that guy. Chiqs don’t be cheap or desperate or too naive.

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To all boys and girls don’t crush on your friends gf or bf. If you do, get ready for some world class telenovela. Later on swapping/exchanging of boyfriends and girlfriends happen. You will hear stories like ‘his ex is dating that girl’s ex ‘

Your bae Is your bae as long as you together. Don’t stress yourself with whatever he/she is doing outside. Guys won’t stop hitting on your chiq. The moments that count are those that you are together.

CLUBBING

In your years in campus of course you will hit the club/bash. Here is what you need to know:

  1. Never go out without your I.D
  2. Leave your phone behind but you can carry it if you want.
  3. Have enough cash with you.
  4. For chiqs, have fare and get really lit during the party. Drinks and sheesha dudes will provide
  5. In your partying squad there should be one guy who doesn’t get wasted like the lot of you. He will guarantee you get home safe.
  6. Whatever happens in the club/bash stays in the club.
  7. If you really get wasted and start tripping blame it on the alcohol.
  8. Don’t be stingy contribute something.

THINGS TO DO IN CAMPUS

There are a ton of things you can do in campus

1. There is modelling

2. Photography/photoshoots

3. Join a dance crew

4. If you a poet sharpen your skills

5. Watch all the movies/series

6. Be an Instagram fanatic

7. Plenty of sports to participate in

8. Start a business (sell weed or anything you think is profitable)

9. Explore the location you are in.

10. Get involved with events planning

11. Socialise

12. Lastly read

Above all God be your guide.

Dudes master everything about bro codes. It’s your second bible. The codes will really help with your bros.

I can go on and on about campus but one thing I know is that you can’t prepare for campus. There is no guidebook for campus. You just have to pray bad shit doesn’t happen to you. You are in an experimental phase. You will discover what works for you and what doesn’t.

Get your priorities right. You may do this and that but in the end all that won’t mean shit if you don’t get out of there with that degree.

Your parents, siblings, pastor, neighbour will all warn you about university but what i have said is all that matters.

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Dennis Menez

I'm Dennis but you can call me menez. Get in touch with me on 0725364091

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