LIVING CODES PART 2….

Its a man vs woman world out here.We trying to outsmart each other day in day out. As usual women get more complicated and we men end up coming with ways to maintain the balance.Lets begin…

Men vs women

Here is the thing;men and women think differently.This means that in most cases, men and women do not behave, feel, think, or respond in the same ways, either on the inside or on the outside

  • Women See Relationships, Men See Body Parts (he’s so nice, she got a big ass)
  • Men want sex, and women want relationships.
  • Men look for a place to have sex,women think of why they will be having sex.

Guys think of sex more times than women.The P makes us go Gaga.At times we are controlled by it.Come to think of it we do all the work in an intimacy relationship.

look at it in this way….

a normal dating scenario.

A man is responsible for:

Asking the woman out

Choosing a venue for the date

Paying for the date

Advancing the physical intimacy

When physical intimacy does commence, he’s also responsible for:

Achieving and maintaining an erection

Getting her wet

Giving her pleasure

Most of the physical work of sex

And here’s the real kicker—the part of sex that a man is also responsible for that turns the whole thing into an exercise in absurdity—the man is also responsible for his own orgasm.Luckily no guy will complain about it.

Its our role.Its what we signed up for when initiating a relationship.As we all know money and pussy rule the world.

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Am sure there are so many things women would love us guys to know about them but here are the things we guys want women to know.

MENS’ RULES FOR WOMEN

1.Crying is blackmail.

2.Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

3.Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

4.Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

5. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

6.When he asks for a threesome with you and your best friend, he is only joking.

7.Unless the answer is yes.

8. In which case, can he videotape it?

9.If you really want a nice guy, stop dating good-looking assholes.

10. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys.

11.If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.

12.If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

13.You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

14.ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

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15.If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

16.If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” we will act like nothing’s wrong. 

17.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

18.If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.

19.When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine … 

20.Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football,cars.

21.You have enough clothes.

22.You have too many shoes.

23.Shopping is not fascinating

24.Any attempt by a man to prepare food, no matter how feeble ( i.e. microwaving ) should be met with roughly the same degree of praise a parent might shower upon their infant when it walks for the first time.

25.Those male models with perfect bodies are all gay. Accept it.

26.You know, you can ask him out too…. Let’s spread the rejection around a little.

27.He does not just want to be friends.

28.Do not question a man’s innate navigational abilities by suggesting he stop for directions.


WOMEN’S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want..

5. I am sorry = you’ll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You’re in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!

10. You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

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MEN’S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let’s have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. Can i dance with you? = I’d like to have sex with you

8. Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you

9. Do you want to go out? = I’d like to have sex with you

10. Can I take you out for lunch? = I’d like to have sex with you

11. I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit = I’m gay
The world keeps on evolving and we keep on changing.Time changes things.

Guys share this to all your lady friends.Let them know what we have always wanted them to know

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Dennis Menez

I'm Dennis but you can call me menez. Get in touch with me on 0725364091

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