Sun. Dec 15th, 2019

Menez

The Menez Effect

Dear Dark-skinned Kenyan Women

4 min read

Dear dark-skinned Kenyan women,

Do you know how adorable you are?

Seriously. Do you know or you just assume you are not because society has magnified the claim that men love yellow yellow ladies? Or do you assume you are not hot because the majority of memes online make fun of dark-skinned women?

Do you look in the washroom mirror when you are taking those tuselfies, then smile and tell yourself “damn..I am one fine lady”? Do you appreciate yourself? Are you madly in love with yourself? Has anyone looked at you today and said, “Wow, Unakaa poa sana..”

Well if not, I just did.

I know how hard it is to be a dark-skinned girl in Kenya. It’s not terrible. but it’s still kinda hard. As a dark-skinned mamii, you are often sandwiched in between two struggles you never asked to bear. There’s the struggle of being told “Light skin is hot” and having chocolate skin is a curse. Then there is the added struggle of seeing people constantly making fun of women who are just like you.

I know it sucks when some humans judge you based off your skin complexion. But don’t mind them. Let your nutella skin shine bright.

No man, not even me, has to tell you how awesome you are, tell yourself. Be in love with everything that you are. Look at all the successful dark-skinned women out there. Do they look like they are ashamed of their skin? Stop thinking that when a man rejects you, it’s because of your complexion.

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Don’t let anyone tell you, you aren’t enough, because my sister, you are. You are smart, exotic, complex, and incredibly phenomenal. You don’t see it, but sensible people with solid IQs do. Learn to accept yourself, appreciate yourself, because if you don’t who will?

As a dark-skinned chick, you are the very embodiment of black beauty. From your wondrous flesh, to the beautiful melanin that fills every part of your skin, you are a queen. I repeat. You. Are. A. Queen. Not many will understand your royalty. They will downright deny it. They will try to tear you down. Because of that you must develop a thick skin to withstand all the hate or social discrimination.

Consider it an honor to be hand-selected by the Creator who poured greatness into your sun-glazed skin and those strong, sexy bodies. Love being a dark-skinned lady just like light-skinned women love being the way they are. Enjoy it. Consider it a blessing. It’s your skin. You cannot unzip your blackness, fold it, and pack it in a handbag..

One of the biggest regrets you can have in life is allowing other people to tell you how you should feel about yourself. Don’t you let anybody make you question or conceal your individual magic. Learn to recognize when people are pointing out areas you can grow and when folks are being malicious and ugly and mean for no other reason except that they’re real talented at being malicious and ugly and mean. That’s a reflection on them and absolutely not on you.

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I know it’s hard feeling when you’re constantly in a battle with a society that tries their hardest to tell you you’re not hot. I see your fight, I feel your fight, and I’m telling you to just ignore it the way you ignore a message from a guy you don’t like.

Give the hate some blue ticks, Don’t let it keep you up at night because not every battle will be won. You will still meet that one self-hating lost guy who won’t date you because you’re dark skin, and that’s okay. There is plenty of men or women, across different cultures that find your skin beautiful. Including me right here,

Don’t stress because you saw a post on Twitter that said you weren’t beautiful. Don’t stress because your crush doesn’t date dark skin women. Don’t stress if it seems like every man you meet only wants your fair skinned counterpart. After all,there is more to a woman than just beauty. You are more than just breasts,skin and thighs and ass.

So, to my dark-skinned Kenyan women, you are robust, sensitive and compassionate just like all other black women. You are confident, and fierce. You have a fire in you that could never be extinguished. Demand respect, and stand up for yourself. Be you.

Dark-skinned girls rock. Your melanin makes you exactly who you are and your black is so beautiful.
Understand that the standards you set for yourself are the standards men will judge with. If you see yourself as top quality, men will too. Color is just a distraction from what a real woman is truly about.

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Dark skin is special – dipped in chocolate, bronzed in elegance, enameled with grace, toasted with beauty. For that reason, always thrive in it. Cheers to all the dark-skinned women who ignore the dark-skinned vs light-skinned debate. As Africans and black people, we have better things to do than discriminate between different colors of own race.

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