The 10 Commandments To Having A Friends With Benefits
Let’s be honest, having a friends with benefits can be incredibly convenient. What’s not to love about the idea having no-strings-attached sex with someone you kinda like and respect, but don’t necessarily want a future with?
Not everyone wants to date, some just want to have fun with one person without a real obligation. That’s why such relationships are so popular.
Having a friend with benefits is like a dream come true to most, but that doesn’t mean it can’t necessarily turn into a nightmare if not handled correctly.
This relationship is great in theory, but often fails miserably due to maintenance and overall execution. Being friends with benefits is a fun, mutually beneficial relationship where you don’t have to take anyone out on a date, but you get to call them anytime you want a piece of that ass or dick. No dates, no endless chats, no hangouts, no bullshit.
It seems simple enough, so why do most of these relationships end terribly?
Menez.co.ke is here to give you the 10 commandments to making your friends with benefits relationship work.
Commandment #1: Thou Shall Not Fall in Love
We all know that the more you fuck someone the more you develop feelings for them. It’s very understandable to start developing feelings for your friend with benefit.
If that happens, slap yourself, sprinkle some cold water on your face, have a drink, and remember, there’s a reason you didn’t want to date this person to begin with.
Commandment #2: Thou Shall Not Text oftenly unless it’s a Sext
The only text message you should be sending a friend with benefits is “my place or yours?” and possibly a naked picture that may or may not end up online someday. Other than that, don’t ask how their day was, what they had for lunch, or make any kind of bullshit small talk via text because you’re bored.
Friends with benefits have strict guidelines and if they are crossed, it leaves room for confusion, awkwardness, and disappointment.
Commandment #3: Thou Shall Not Go On a Date with a Friend with Benefits
Anything, and I do mean anything can constitute a date. So, you have to be extra careful. Meeting in school to eat? Date. Quick bite to eat before a quickie? Date. Anything that promotes conversation outside of yelling out “Oh God” … date.
Going out with someone who you have a strictly sexual relationship with leaves the door open for emotional attachment. Emotional attachment will then lead to feelings. Feelings will then lead to your play toy crying over a relationship that doesn’t actually exist.
Commandment #4: Thou Shall Not Introduce to Friends
This is absolutely unacceptable, unless you introduce them as follows: “Hey guys this is ______, we have a strict fuck when we’re horny relationship so you’re not allowed to like this person, because I honestly don’t unless we’re in bed.”
If you introduce your friend with benefits to the people who matter in your life, and they actually end up liking the person, you’ll never hear the end of it. So, save yourself the headache and a week of soul searching and keep the relationship between you and your partner.
Commandment #5: Thou Shall Keep the Door Open for New Relationships
The reason these kinds of relationships rarely work out is because people close themselves off from finding someone they actually want to be with. They think that because they already have someone to fuck, they don’t need to look for anyone else.
A friend with benefits is a temporary fix and should never be confused as a relationship. You have to be open to the possibility of meeting someone who you may actually want to spend some quality time with and eventually close your legs to the past.
Commandment #6: Thou Shall Not Get Jealous
Keep the lines of communication open. If you’ve met someone you like, have the courtesy to tell your sexual significant other. On the other hand, if they have met someone they like, under no circumstances can you get jealous.
The ground rules were set from the beginning: sex and nothing more. You should be able to be emotionally unattached to a friend with benefits (if you follow the commandments above) and therefore have no problem making a clean break from one another.
Commandment #7: Thou Shall Know the Difference between a Back-Up and a FWB
Quick tutorial: A back-up and a friend with benefits are two completely different entities. A back-up is a friend you probably have never slept with. This person is most likely a close friend of the opposite sex (or same, whatever floats your boat).
A back-up is someone you may eventually end up with because everyone in your life already loves and accepts them. Never, ever, confuse a back-up for a friend with benefits. Back-ups are out there for everyone to see but, as we established before, friends with benefits are for your eyes only.
Commandment #8: Thou Shall Not Cuddle
Save that shit for your next relationship. The beauty of a friends with benefits is that normal rules don’t apply.
You don’t have to cuddle afterwards or spend the night, and you can tell the person what you like and how you like it and no feelings should ever get hurt. This is a no holds barred relationship, get yours and make sure you’re always getting it good.
Commandment #9: Thou Shall Not Be FWB with an Actual Friend
Friends with benefits works best if it’s with a person you’ve recently met and haven’t bonded with. People who were actually friends before have an emotional attachment to one another and that may lead to a hot mess of a relationship. Friends hooking up leads to friends cuffing up.
Commandment #10: Thou Shall Follow All of My Rules
Because I know what I’m talking about.
Here is a post on how to get a friends with benefits. Click here